Discover the surprising downside of sharing your goals aloud in today's digital age. Uncover how the social reality effect can hinder your progress, leaving you feeling satisfied without taking meaningful steps forward. Learn practical strategies to navigate this phenomenon and stay focused on your aspirations. Read on for tips on selective sharing, action-oriented planning, and celebrating real milestones. Find the balance between external validation and internal drive. Dive into the full blog for insights and actionable advice.

Explore the transformative journey of overcoming low self-esteem, guided by the concept of mindful debugging. Uncover the power of self-guided experiences through purposeful workbooks designed for personal growth. Discover tangible benefits and witness the transformative process that leads to a more empowered and resilient self and ultimately raise your self-esteem!

The belief that "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" doesn't always hold true for trauma survivors. Trauma can lead to behaviors like excessive accommodation, tolerance of negativity, emotional clutter, quick forgiveness, and difficulty asserting oneself. Loved ones should encourage survivors to express needs, set boundaries, and be patient. Survivors may also face challenges in speaking up, excessive sensitivity, trust issues, and navigating relationships. The path to healing involves understanding these changes, fostering open communication, and providing support for a balanced and fulfilling life.

Our words shape our brains. Expressions like "I feel depressed" reinforce negativity. Discussing problems offers temporary relief but often leads to frustration and limited change. Positive affirmations benefit those with high self-esteem but may worsen negative beliefs for those with low self-esteem due to confirmation bias. Understanding how our brains interpret language, including sensory experiences, is crucial for lasting change and personal growth.

As the strong, silent type and a devoted executive and family man, my dad dedicated himself to self-improvement and our family's well-being. He actively worked on his marriage and was a constant in our lives despite a demanding career. After his passing, I uncovered his deep-seated struggles through a letter about my childhood abuse. This revealed his inner conflict and regret for not protecting me more, shedding light on the complex emotional challenges men face in balancing societal strength with vulnerability. His journey deeply resonates with me, highlighting the intricate dance between masculinity and emotional openness.

In this blog post, I shine a spotlight on a critical message: The significance of listening to survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Join me as I emphasize the importance of providing survivors with a safe space to share their stories. By lending an empathetic ear and validating their experiences, we can help survivors heal and contribute to a more compassionate society.

This blog post explores two mindsets: "go-getter" (enthusiastic and goal-oriented - moving towards) and "avoider" (cautious and problem-focused - moving away from). Let’s talk about the importance of language patterns in shaping our reality and encourage a balanced communication style that considers both pursuing goals and addressing challenges.

Creating, welcoming, accepting communication is desperately needed as a foundation of being human - a healthy human. Survivors of childhood sexual abuse, rape, bullying, and abuse are all taught to keep their mouths shut. The perpetrators NEED our silence in order to survive. Because of the nature of abuse, we comply as best as we can. As a mom I was determined to protect my kids, and creating open communication was paramount in that. Here’s another step in my journey of Getting Past Survivor so my kids don’t have to.

When my children were growing up, our dinner table was a special place. Each night, one of them would be the moderator, asking questions that brought us closer together. We shared the best and worst parts of our day, what made us laugh and cry, something we learned, and our favorite memory. These conversations created a bond that will forever be cherished.

Life is full of chaos. And that’s a bad thing, right? Or is it? Reframing what we perceive as negative into something that’s positive will shift your focus into finding the bright side of life!

The map and territory are metaphors used to illustrate the difference between the actual world and our understanding of the world as we perceive it to be. The ‘map’ is our understanding of the ‘territory’ of reality, and we must be careful to remember that the map is not the territory! Let's talk about how distorted maps affect relationships so we can become more aware of how we're seeing the world. The more we understand our views, the more we can update our maps, the better we can relate to others and with ourselves!

The Power of the Woobie

We don’t really know the power of stuffed animals and blankets when we first give them to our babies, but as babies are developing they are developing attachment to the objects around them and these woobies become much more than objects to babies. They’re comfort within that last a lifetime.

You can run, but you can’t hide. Technology always has a way of getting through.

My mind raced…How could I go by myself?? But I knew that if I didn’t go, I’d be missing a chance of a lifetime!

We talked about what she was feeling and I shared a comparison between an empathetic heart and a sympathetic heart.

In the heat of the moment, when I’m reacting to situations, it’s not Master’s Degree Helen talking, it’s Little Survivor Brain Helen defending herself. This wasn’t work, this was personal. This was life.

One little phrase can impact us for decades . . . Here’s one of the most impactful I’ve experienced.

Getting Past Survivor is the break free from cocoon to butterfly.

Here’s where I begin to share … Why Getting Past Survivor? Why a Blog and Podcast?

A friend called me out on one word I uttered the other day.